Joke Time

[j.a.f.e.]

Well, someone had to start it. Post them up just please not too risque.

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[j.a.f.e.]

Bought a vinyl record of wasp noises yesterday. When played it sounded nothing like wasps to me then I realized I was playing the bee side.

[SteelWheels]

I got one

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Pep

[j.a.f.e.]

I lost my job at the keyboard factory. I didn't put in enough shifts.

[bonneyman]

Two men at a bar were arguing about if a man could become a woman. A scientist walked up to them, and said he was involved with an experiment about that very subject.

They took 50 men, and gave each of them 10 shots of whiskey. They came to the conclusion that 100% of men could become women - because they started talked nonsense and couldn't drive.

[j.a.f.e.]

I applied for a job at the mirror factory. I could see myself doing that.

[j.a.f.e.]

People with conflicting names...

Gary Numan vs Gary Oldman
Britney Spears vs Brooke Shields
Marvin Gaye vs George Strait
Diane Farr vs Glenn Close
Amber Heard vs Mos Def
Lyle Lovett vs Norman Leavitt
MC Hammer vs Jimmy Nail
Ruby Wax vs John Wayne
Genghis Khan vs Immanuel Kant
Steve Swallow vs Mark Spitz

[jabberwoki]

lol.

[j.a.f.e.]

Just witnessed a man collapse onto the luggage carousel at the airport.

Worked out OK though he slowly came round.

[j.a.f.e.]

What's another word for thesaurus?

[Muddy]

I relabeled my wife's spices in the cabinet. I haven't gotten in trouble yet... 

But the thyme is cumin....

[j.a.f.e.]

I have a phobia of speed bumps ..... but I'm slowly getting over it.

[Muddy]

I didn't understand why the baseball was getting bigger..... Then it hit me.

[j.a.f.e.]

We got overrun with insects. Had to call out the swat team.

[AbiggerGarage]

I'm dying to see if I miss the Doctor's cute nurse again this week.  Just missed Ana Phylaxis   by a tiny amount last time.